In the future I will write more about my past, which I think you will find more interesting and will better explain why I'm still a virgin.
But today I will write about my date on Tuesday night because it's more temporally relevant. Her name is Sarah and I met her on Match.com. (There are probably lots of virgins using Match.com because it's a lot less scary setting up a date with someone via online personals than it is to approach someone in person and ask her out or ask for her phone number so you can call her to ask them out.)
There was once a time when any contact at all with a girl was a terrifying experience, but I've come to like first dates if the girl is nice. There is no sexual pressure on a first date except at the end when I don't know what I'm supposed to do. (Do I peck her on the cheek? Shake her hand? Grope her ass and stick my tongue in her mouth? I have no idea.)
I met her at her apartment, which is much better than meeting at some restaurant or bar where I'd have to stand outside wondering if I'd recognize her. But it's somewhat surprising that she allowed such a meeting place. I'd be embarrassed if I let a woman from Match.com meet me at my apartment, and she turned out to be grotesquely overweight, and the doorman had to see me going out with such an horrific date. Maybe my photos gave her some level of confidence (not that I look so great), or maybe she is so used to living in a doorman building that she no longer thinks of the doormen as human beings.
Although not drop dead gorgeous, Sarah did turn out to be pleasant looking. Her two main flaws are (1) she looks 36 years old (which is her age); and (2) she has a weak chin. And yes, I shouldn't judge people because I'd surely come up short if others judged me, but unfortunately I'm a human being, and this is what we human beings do.
Because I was late on account of getting stuck at a meeting at work, I said something like "since I get paid by the hour, I guess I owe you a nice dinner," and she took the opening to suggest this very nice Italian place near Lincoln Center with outdoor seating. Although dinner wound up costing $120, I'd say it was worth the money, because it was one of those really nice places you always wish you were dining at, but you can't go there alone, and you can't go there with a guy friend because people would think you were gay eating at a place like that with another guy. So you really need a girlfriend or a date, and because dates are rare and I've never had a girlfriend, such a nice meal was a welcome opportunity.
And I enjoyed her company. She was nice to look at and pleasant to talk to. But she was not as bright as most of the women in Manhattan. She only went to a local state school instead of an elite private college like most Manhattanites (yours truly included). And she was completely fascinated by the fact that we both had the same birthday. I pointed out that one of every 365 people you meet will have the same birthday as you, but she seemed unable to grasp the mathematics. And then she started telling me about her interest in astrology, which I had to politely listen to. Believing in astrology isn't the worst flaw a woman can have. Being a vegetarian, for example, would be a lot worse.
After dinner I walked her back to her apartment building, at which time I had to deal with that awkward ending. The first time around wasn't so great, she would have let me kiss on her on her lips, but I chickened out and went left. Then we stood outside talking for another twenty minutes or so, and although she's going on vacation for the next two weeks, she encouraged me to call her on her cell phone while she was away. I find it very touching when a woman gives me encouragement to call her again, because in my initial experiences with dating (which I will write about in future posts), my first dates almost always tried to avoid all contact with me afterwards. I then kissed her again, and this time landed a quick kiss on her lips, and touched her upper arm while doing so. Better than the first time.